40 Times Hotels Just Got It Completely Wrong

38. Press for ass

It’s always nice to know your hotel has 24-hour reception in case you need anything. Well, this place took that promise one step further by promising customers that they could get after-hours ass – so long as they pressed the right elevator button.

37. Stairway to nowhere

Fancy resorts draw in customers with their luxe design choices and striking architectural features. Perhaps this hotel wanted to emulate the latter by building a grand staircase up to… A stucco wall. Stunning.

36. Secret shower passageway

A hotel room with a city view? Yes, please. A hotel room with a city view that you can only get by opening a door inside of the shower that opens onto the balcony? We’ll pass.

35. Well-ventilated bathroom

There’s nothing better than checking into a hotel room with a sparkling clean, crisp smelling bathroom. We can almost guarantee that you won’t get the latter in this on-suite facility, wherein the air vent has been installed over a wall of non-breathable tile.

34. Not the best hotel name

Some things simply don’t translate, and this hotel’s name stands as a prime example of that. We imagine that some English speakers might listen to the instructions in the title and book somewhere else.

33. Deadly headboard

Have a nightmare that makes you sit straight up in bed in this hotel, and you’re at risk of being decapitated by this poorly situated shelf. Someone could’ve just stood on the bed for more height while hanging it, but that would make too much sense.

32. Hole-y art

Take a quick look at this piece of art, and you might think you’re seeing a very private body part. In reality, what you’re looking at is a strange piece of art found in a hotel dining room.

31. ‘You can never leave’

The hotel guest who took this photo likened their accommodation to the one described in the Eagles’ classic hit: “Hotel California.” The song’s lyrics say, “You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave,” as do these dueling exit signs.

30. Sinking to a new low

Want to wash your hands in this hotel bathroom? You are going to have to turn on the water, and just hope that the working faucet is hanging over the sink and not one of the fixtures jutting from the wall.

29. Brush with an empty roll

Only an empty roll of toilet paper would reveal this incredible hotel fail. A guest noticed the cardboard cylinder… As well as the old toothbrush employed to keep it all together.

28. Salt and pepper non-shakers

There’s not much better than ordering room service and eating dinner in a fancy hotel bed. But all that luxury goes out of the window if your hotel fails to provide you with a sensical set of salt and pepper shakers.

27. Microscopic cinema room

This hotel nailed most of the details of its on-site cinema room. But the plush red chairs and matching maroon walls give way to a very normal-sized television, which… doesn’t work in a movie theater.

26. A chilling sight

In this hotel’s defense, the property is located in Minnesota, where winters can get pretty cold. Still, having an ice-covered door is not a good look. We just hope the heaters in the guest rooms worked well.

25. Mixed (smoke) signals

It’d be weird enough to book a non-smoking hotel room and find an ashtray inside of it. But what if the ashtray also warned you against smoking? This hotel room has to be confusing to all lodgers – whether they smoke or not.

24. Unwelcome gift

They say the best things come in small packages, which is true – unless you’re staying at this hotel. One guest chronicled their welcome gift and, well, the tiny, bow-wrapped box contained an even less substantial present inside.

23. Missed it by an inch

Whoever engineered this sink in a Helsinki hotel room must’ve smudged their calculations before making the final cuts. There’s really no other explanation for the major engineering fail we see here.

22. A/C with a caveat

This hotel likely advertised that they had air-conditioning. But what they surely failed to mention was that two rooms shared one unit. And, unluckily for this guest, the controls were apparently in their neighbor’s room.

21. A bit of a stretch

A nice spacious bathroom is a great hotel room feature. But it can become an inconvenience when the layout puts the toilet on one end of the room and the toilet paper on the other.

20. Can’t take the heat

After a long day of travel, there’s not much better than a hot shower. If you’re on the move, then, try not to book at this hotel, where they literally bar guests from making water too warm.

19. No such thing as privacy

You have your hotel room to yourself. Still, there’s something extremely off-putting about there being a window directly into the en-suite bathroom. And the blinds don’t make it much better, either.

18. Fall with grace

A wet shower’s slippery, and you know to be careful. Still, this shower in a Chinese hotel gave extra, very necessary warning to those who stepped inside: if you’re going to slip, do so carefully.

17. Unappetizing artwork

There are so many benign subject matters when it comes to choosing artwork for a dining area. So we’ll never understand why this hotel chose the most unappetizing piece to hang over its breakfast nook.

16. Room with a view

Nothing like waking up in the morning, remembering you’re on vacation, bounding out of bed and ripping back the curtains to reveal… a full sheet of drywall. Do better, hotel.

15. Good luck finding your room

This hotel guide is anything but handy – and it leaves us with a lot of questions. Do rooms 200 – 207 exist? What about 228 – 249? If so, do they just not have space for any more arrows? We may never know the truth.

14. Don’t book here

This hotel probably has plenty of amenities for guests, but the library is not one of them. You can enjoy looking at the books all you want, but actually cracking them open and reading them? Absolutely not.

13. Bathroom break in the neck

The designer of this hotel bathroom must’ve felt slick when they slid a toilet into otherwise wasted space beneath a sloping roof. Sure, users could sit on it, but a portion of the bathroom-using demographic prefers to stand, which… doesn’t work here.

12. Cozy, completely inaccessible seating area

Just a heads up to hotel designers; most people who wait to check into a hotel lobby sit in chairs – on the ground floor. They do not want to climb into the space above the counter to find a seat.

11. Overzealous amount of curtains

A grand hotel room wouldn’t be complete with floor-to-ceiling curtains. This space delivers – but with a twist. The tapestries don’t hide full-sized windows, though. Instead, they’re covering a single extra-small pane.

10. You can’t sleep here

You check into a hotel room so you can get some rest. But what happens when there’s no room for the bed? That is a very real dilemma in this fail of an accommodation.

9. Insert hotel-appropriate inspiration here

If a hotel had an inspirational quote on the wall, what would it say? We’ll never know, because this place forgot to fill in the template with their own wise words. And, for that misstep, they had the words “your text sample here” emblazoned onto the wall.

8. Want to get to the second floor? Don’t press two

Is this elevator in a hotel or in Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory? Strangely enough, it’s a very real shot from a hotel that seems to have lost the number two button for their elevator. Instead, they had to rely on the six to get guests where they needed to go, which is a true brain bender.

7. Flaws, magnified

A close-up makeup mirror can help you pluck your brows or flick your eyeliner to perfection. But a distorted one can make you look as scary as this guy, who wrote on Reddit that the hotel looking glass put his self-esteem “back in check.”

6. Crime scene curtains

Walking into this hotel room, you might worry that the police have just left and taken their crime scene tape with them. But don’t fret – the blood-spattered curtains are just a very, very bad design choice.

5. Subtle numbering

Neutral tones are great because they go with everything – well, almost anything. This hotel tried and failed to make tan ink legible atop a tan wallpapered background. Good luck finding your room.

4. Failed to mention the gravel

The Redditor who visited this accommodation said that the place boasted about this feature – at least, before the person checked in. The guest lamented, “The motel advertised that they had a pool. They did not mention that it was filled with gravel.”

3. Sorry for the incontinence

Swap out a few letters and you have the word “inconvenience,” which is what this hotel sign should say. Instead, it apologizes for the pool being closed because it can’t control its bladder.

2. What’s the Wi-Fi password?!

If you want to log onto the internet at this hotel, you’d better be ready to type. The Wi-Fi network’s password is more than 30 characters long – a length that is arguably ridiculous.

1. A note you don’t want to read

Now, this is a message you never want to receive while you’re at a hotel. One person found a note hidden in their bed from another patron, warning that, if the paper was still there, the bed sheets hadn’t been washed. Now, that is beyond a fail – that’s flat-out disgusting.